Germination

As Gobby blatantly and smugly enjoyed her early lead in the proceedings, it became clear that things were hotting up in the husband/wife race for second place.

So much so that the incandescently competitive Tubthumper may have begun to rue his decision to forgo the princely sum of £2.50 paid by his wife for a seed tray and propagation lid in favour of two used plum punnets from the supermarket when it became clear on comparison that Spudgirl's initial outlay may be reaping horticultural rewards:

Meanwhile, and to nobody's great surprise after dismissing many a gardener's preferred growing medium of rich potting compost in favour of his own blend of back garden sludge, Tattoo's efforts, way back in 3rd place, were proving very slow to break through.

However, suddenly and in turncoat fashion, after scathing the others for their technical use of 'artificial heat' then claiming his own airing cupboard to be too full, Tattoo braved the wrath of Jordan who, on returning home to find him nowhere to be seen but the fire on full in the living room, was wholly disconcerted by the new occupants therein:

Subsequently and initially to his great delight, the first tender green shoots finally broke through the slurry but, on Tattoo's own admission, looked nothing like the pumpkin seedlings proudly displayed by the rest of the Regulars. At this juncture Gobby did feel it only right and just to question as to whether these first signs of life were likely to develop into pumpkins at all or could simply be stray weeds and, on viewing the most pitiful pot of all, the Regulars mused as to whether, yet again, Ol' Blue Eyes' selection would inevitably prove to be an 'also ran'.