Sanctuary

After years subjected to the falsehoods, fabrications and perjury that amount to many an unsolicited encounter with Tweety, (see March 2006 - Big Bands, November 2006 - Tickets, April 2008 - Mythomania and January 2009 - Jump(er)ing into 2009) the Regulars, hiding round a corner of the Local, believed they had escaped this particular night's onslaught.

They were not however prepared for the fact that the recently incumbent Landlord and Landlady, Buzz Lightyear & Marlene, less accustomed to such heights of lunacy would too seek refuge in the far corners of their own establishment and recount the evening's magical mystery tour of a mind unable to disentangle reality from fantasy and inebriation with the declaration of having,

"Never heard such rubbish in 16 years of the pub trade!"

Nothing the Regulars could say in reassurance, however, summed up the situation quite as eloquently as the astute observation of the barmaid in informing the Regulars that the aforementioned delusional liar had,

"Gone to take his mouth for a sh*t."